2nd Commentary Story
Editorial on Fast Food:
It's that time of year. The time when everyone rushes to buy gifts, pick up groceries for family dinners, and run other errands. Most people don't have time to make a healthy dinner, understandably, so people just pick up some fast food in the midst of busy schedules. It's impossible to say no one ever does it, but the question is, how is it possible to have a balance? Most don't know the affects of fast food on our bodies, but maybe if more people did, society would have a much more healthy lifestyle.
Evidence has shown from studies that, sadly, fast food restaurants have a history of putting convenience for them over health. From tests, it's prominent that many restaurants add high fructose corn syrup to their drinks to make them more sugary, use 'stretchy' chemicals in bread that are used in yoga mats, and do much more.
McDonald's is so popular that it continues to sell 75 hamburgers a minute, but there's always been controversy over what's exactly in them. Like many other fast food restaurants that sell hamburgers, it's not so great. In the meat of a hamburger, it might be possible that when biting into a delicious hamburger, it could be made up of the meat of many different cows.
After being slaughtered, the meat from cows is scattered (the cheaper bits) for processing. This meat is clumped together in circular balls and shipped of for fast food restaurants to be given to consumers.
What's even more disturbing is the cheese. Cheeseburgers at fast food restaurants have always had different-tasting cheese. Well, that's because most of the time what's in them is only 50% cheese. The other 50% is made up of chemicals and additives.
On the other side, some fast food restaurants such as PTerry's are known for using natural ingredients and treating their cows well. With the right information, if many people knew about the vast difference between fast food chains, then our society's overall health could be boosted. Or even just by limiting the amount we consume of other restaurants or knowing what to order off the menu that's better for us could be beneficial. There are other fast food restaurants that aren't as unhealthy, such as Chipotle, Panera Bread, and Jason's Deli.
Moving over to spicy foods, some favorites are spicy buffalo wings and chili. What do fast food restaurants do to make it spicy? They add silicon dioxide, or in other words, sand. That can't be in any way healthy for our bodies to consume.
Obviously, all fast food chains shouldn't be taken down. It's understandable that since it's called 'fast food' they have to make some compromises to make the process go quickly. It's important though to not hurt consumers in the process though.
Overall, with the right choices on where to go or even what to order on menus, consumers can lead a healthier lifestyle. Our bodies don't get enough credit, and we don't thank them by putting these materials into them. Fast food chains have already started to change for the better after having these facts come out. For example, subway has apparently stopped using the 'stretchy bread' that was previously mentioned. Hopefully with us taking a stand, other fast food places might start changing for the better too.
556 words
It's that time of year. The time when everyone rushes to buy gifts, pick up groceries for family dinners, and run other errands. Most people don't have time to make a healthy dinner, understandably, so people just pick up some fast food in the midst of busy schedules. It's impossible to say no one ever does it, but the question is, how is it possible to have a balance? Most don't know the affects of fast food on our bodies, but maybe if more people did, society would have a much more healthy lifestyle.
Evidence has shown from studies that, sadly, fast food restaurants have a history of putting convenience for them over health. From tests, it's prominent that many restaurants add high fructose corn syrup to their drinks to make them more sugary, use 'stretchy' chemicals in bread that are used in yoga mats, and do much more.
McDonald's is so popular that it continues to sell 75 hamburgers a minute, but there's always been controversy over what's exactly in them. Like many other fast food restaurants that sell hamburgers, it's not so great. In the meat of a hamburger, it might be possible that when biting into a delicious hamburger, it could be made up of the meat of many different cows.
After being slaughtered, the meat from cows is scattered (the cheaper bits) for processing. This meat is clumped together in circular balls and shipped of for fast food restaurants to be given to consumers.
What's even more disturbing is the cheese. Cheeseburgers at fast food restaurants have always had different-tasting cheese. Well, that's because most of the time what's in them is only 50% cheese. The other 50% is made up of chemicals and additives.
On the other side, some fast food restaurants such as PTerry's are known for using natural ingredients and treating their cows well. With the right information, if many people knew about the vast difference between fast food chains, then our society's overall health could be boosted. Or even just by limiting the amount we consume of other restaurants or knowing what to order off the menu that's better for us could be beneficial. There are other fast food restaurants that aren't as unhealthy, such as Chipotle, Panera Bread, and Jason's Deli.
Moving over to spicy foods, some favorites are spicy buffalo wings and chili. What do fast food restaurants do to make it spicy? They add silicon dioxide, or in other words, sand. That can't be in any way healthy for our bodies to consume.
Obviously, all fast food chains shouldn't be taken down. It's understandable that since it's called 'fast food' they have to make some compromises to make the process go quickly. It's important though to not hurt consumers in the process though.
Overall, with the right choices on where to go or even what to order on menus, consumers can lead a healthier lifestyle. Our bodies don't get enough credit, and we don't thank them by putting these materials into them. Fast food chains have already started to change for the better after having these facts come out. For example, subway has apparently stopped using the 'stretchy bread' that was previously mentioned. Hopefully with us taking a stand, other fast food places might start changing for the better too.
556 words
I think this commentary piece is very good. I liked how you used real life examples to prove your point and show a good example of the negative ingredients in fast food products. I think you could improve on addressing and opposing the other side's opinion more, as well as making sure to clearly state our opinion in the first paragraph. Overall I thought it was well written.
ReplyDeleteThis commentary piece was very well structured and provided convincing arguments while still addressing the other sides POV. It was nicely written but could have possibly used some quotes. I enjoyed reading this.
ReplyDeleteWhile the story was good overall, I think you could have been more professional in your opinion. You could have also been more specific on what is inside fast food, and mentioned where you got your information from. Other than that, it is a good piece with a well-developed argument.
ReplyDelete